Have you ever experienced connecting someone to something deep in their heart that makes them become so alive they start to shine?
You see their eyes twinkle, they may even become teary and they can’t stop talking about it. All of a sudden you see them in a different light. They are passionate, strong, alive, courageous and full of creativity and ideas.
Have you ever experienced someone unlocking this in you in a conversation?
The most life transforming type of coaching is that which is able to access a person’s passion. In this place, motivation is no problem, obstacles shrink and courage is more easily found. One big differentiator between average mediocre coaching and coaching which radically transforms lives and unlocks huge potential in a person, is a coaches ability to fully engage someone with their strongest areas of passion.
As an experienced coach, who focusses on accessing people’s hearts and their passion in all circumstances, whatever the topic of the coaching session, I abhor the type of coaching that simply goes about setting goals without this essential step of discovering a person’s true 100% aliveness. As I often say to coaches that I train and destiny coaching workshops that I run, what is the point of setting a goal if you don’t actually want to do it? How likely is it to actually happen?
Any good coach’s first job is to access desire, through the heart, the part of you that sings. It may be a part that has long been crushed, suppressed, disillusioned or disappointed, but nevertheless it is still there and still represents the place of your most powerful motivation and potential.
Unfortunately, this is a place that our society, our church life and much that is considered ‘normal’ has neglected. This is very sad and a great strategy from the enemy because in our hearts lie vital clues to our purpose. For example, our calling is our passion. How can we truly and fully be walking in our calling without first being connected to our passion?
Unfortunately, too many people have been taught to shut down their hearts and think with their heads. I have experienced this with almost every person I have coached. One girl came and spoke to me after I spoke at a conference and had a look of shock on her face. She said: “All my life I have volunteered in church to do things that I don’t enjoy, because I thought I wasn’t serving if I enjoyed what I did”.
What happened? When did we decide and build a culture where ‘serving’ was only serving if we did not enjoy it?
How are we going to raise up a passionate generation with strong vision, full of joy and courage if they feel guilty if they enjoy what they do?
My example may seem extreme. The question is how has this attitude come about? Can we spot this belief in some degree in our own mindsets? What does it show us about how we portray God? What does it show us about what we believe about the Christian life? The fact is God has made each and every one of us with unique strengths, gifting, desires and preferences. His intention is that we use all of these to impact the world as only each of us uniquely can.
A great antidote to this is coaching people to access their hearts and passions. We do this by at all times looking for and developing resonance in those we coach. As a coach or leader, its really important to be able lead someone into true resonance, like the type I described at the beginning.
We do this by asking powerful questions that access the heart, then simply listening and encouraging the person to say more as they go deeper and deeper into describing what makes their heart sing. The skill in doing this is not one we tend to be practiced in. There are many coaching tools we can help us to unlock a person’s resonance, their true passion. There are very few environments that give adequate time and space for this to be accomplished. Our traditional church services or conferences, encouraging and spiritually reviving as they are, do not give adequate time and space for people to fully access their hearts. A lecture style format, gives information and knowledge but does not allow a person to interactively personalise what they are hearing in their heart, encountering God in the process in a unique way that connects with their unique journey.
Coaching either individually or in groups gives people this much needed space for expression. It gives them time and most importantly permission to engage, to process, to develop their passion, to nurture their hearts and access their deepest Godly desires. It then helps them decipher all that surfaces. If done in a kingdom way, connecting the coachee directly to God and the spirit in the journey, it also enables them to set action points which they are passionate to achieve.
The result: potential beyond what you can imagine is unlocked!
To read testimonies of how coaching the heart and accessing passion has changed lives go to: http://destinycoachingministries.com/video-testimonies/